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How To Set Yourself Effective Goals

Filed Under (Goals, Motivation, Personal Growth) by Kevin on 30-03-2008

First, decide on your goal. Work out your goal by planning how to go about it and then make every effort to pursue it. Here are some useful ways to achieve this.

Write Down Your Goal

A written down goal takes your attention and concentration. Write it down in detail as this will provide you with the necessary instructions to work towards your goal.

Know Where You Are Going

It is much easier to arrive at your destination when you know where you are going. Always keep where you are headed in sight and this will direct you and keep you on course.

A Detailed Plan is Essential

When you are aware of what you want, how to get it and how having it will make you feel, a detailed plan is essential to your achievements. Break down the steps to reaching your goal and take things one at a time, planning exactly when you will carry out each part of your plan.

Regular Action Works

Take a step towards your goal each and every day. Make a plan of how you will overcome any obstacles you may encounter on your way to achieving your goals.

Use Your Support Network

Assess just what you need to achieve your goal. It could be that new skills are in order or better management of your time is required. If allowing time to reach your goal is necessary then work out what you are prepared to sacrifice in order to make the time you need. Don’t be afraid to ask your support network for a little help. They are, after all, your friends family and colleagues.

Learn From Your Failures

See your failures as an experience along the way to achieving your goal. Obstacles will soon become challenges if you allow them to. Most important of all – don’t throw the towel in. Constantly remind yourself of why you want to reach your goals and how you will feel when you have. Don’t let negativity get in the way and however bored or disheartened you get, stick at it and push yourself to the next step.

Know How to Overcome The Obstacles

Prior to taking on the achievement your goals, make a list of obstacles which you may be faced with. Make contingency plans for such occasions and you will be able to face them as they arise. Be committed to yourself, and don’t use every excuse under the sun to quit when things are getting you down.

Reward, Reward, Reward

You are allowed to give yourself a reward when you have managed to stay on track. Just the thought of this will keep you going through thick and thin.

Food for Thought

If you say you want something but do not do anything about it, you have to seriously doubt how much you really desire to reach this goal. Maybe it is not all that important to you. However, when you really desperately want something you will strive to achieve it so go on, get moving and set yourself a goal.

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Another Stress Reduction Technique

Filed Under (Personal Growth, Relaxation, Stress Management, Wellness) by Kevin on 28-03-2008

If you have not read the previous articles about stress and how it affects the body you should go back and read them before continuing. This article is mainly about how to control your stress. You will find a wonderful stress relieving technique below to help you manage or even eliminate stress.

One stress reducing method is to use your imagination to induce relaxation. The mind is a powerful tool and can easily induce relaxation. You can start this technique by doing some abdominal breathing for about five minutes to relax and wind down. Now imagine yourself in a comfortable place, maybe a hammock on a tropical beach or something else of the sort.

Now take in your surroundings, feel the warm sunshine on your body and notice how it does not only warm your body but it also warms your insides melting all your troubles away. Now listen to all the sounds around you, the birds, the palm trees waving in the nice tropical breeze, maybe even the waves crashing on the shore.

Now notice all of the colors that you are surrounded by. The brown of the tree trunks, the green of the leaves, the sea green color of the water. Take in all of the smells that come from the things around you. The salty smell of the water, the smell of a warm summer breeze, maybe even the coconut smell of suntan lotion. Use your senses to become one with nature.

Now imagine a really bright light coming down from the bright blue sky. This light is engulfing your entire body, feel the warmth and energy. This bright light is your guardian angel. You see her smiling down upon you with the bright halo on her head and a life force that is easy to absorb.

Submit herself to her completely. You should become one with her and through her become one with the universe. She is talking to you; she wants you to know how much she loves you and that she is there to protect you through anything. You can just feel the energy and vibration from her. A new sense of peace and harmony has come over you.

Now you are completely relaxed and your angel wants to share something with you. She knows that there has been something on your mind lately, a question, she wants to answer it for you. She knows what is in your heart and she fills it with knowing and understanding. Now take a couple of minutes to absorb her message, let it sink in.

Now you should thank your angel for the gift that she has given you. As you see her moving further and further away until all you seen is a faint white light, you can start coming out of your trance. Slowly open your eyes and breathe in the air around you. Wiggle your hands and feet and feel how relaxed you are. This is a great state of mind, enjoy it!

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Tips For Effective Listening Skills

Filed Under (Personal Growth, Relationships, Self Esteem, Spiritual Growth) by Kevin on 26-03-2008

It is very important to possess effective listening skills in every aspect of life in order to be able to send your message out. The ability to listen at work, at home, and in social situations is as important as being able to present well. This also applies to leadership, management or a team member position.

It is important to listen because your understanding of the thoughts and motivation of the other person are increased. Being aware of what motivates the other person is the key to enable you to present your message within that situation, consequently your effectiveness will be improved.

Listed below are a few tips that will assist you greatly in improving your listening skills.

1. Listen with Empathy

People generally listen with the intention to answer. This is what conversations are all about.

You can significantly improve the way that you respond better in a conversation by simply adding the slightest twist. In order to appreciate what the other person is saying from his or her point of view, it is important to listen with intent. During those few moments, do not think about how you wish to respond.

Once you have understood the other person’s views, you can then proceed to respond with your views. However, respond in a way that shows empathy to what you have just heard.

In the American Heritage Dictionary, the definition of empathy is the identification and understanding of another person’s situation, feelings and motives.

This, in no way, means that you are accepting the views and opinions of the other person. It simply means that you have given their point of view your due consideration and understanding.

First, it is important, because you may not have completely understood what they were saying, which can result in an incorrect conclusion. However, by receiving more information, it may be that you change your mind about how you respond.

Second, when the other person is aware of the fact that you are listening to what they are saying, they will respond likewise when you speak. You are appreciated by other people when they are aware that you have given their opinions and views your full attention.

2. Ask the Right Questions

People will open up to you during discussions as well as you receiving a better understanding of any situation when you ask the right questions.

People, on many occasions, have a habit of talking based on their understanding of the situation.

Clarification questions should be asked first. When doing this, avoid asking questions that will result in the answer being “yes” or “no”. Begin with broad based questions that will lead to detailed answers. This will result in information being divulged that you maybe would never have thought of.

Another point to note about asking questions is to ask for clarifications when general statements are referred to. For instance, if a person states that there are certain issues that need addressing, ask for a list of those issues.

The other person will think more about the question when it is asked correctly, which will very often result in you being pleasantly surprised that the other person will arrive at the same conclusion as you, without the need to justify it.

3. Be Patient

Even though the value of listening with empathy and asking the right questions are appreciated, it is not an easy thing to do. You need to tell yourself to listen patiently. To be blunt, you need to tell yourself to “shut up” when other people are talking.

It is simple to inform someone of our opinions as soon as they enter our heads. A great deal of patience is required to listen and hold on to your thoughts. This requires a conscious decision and effort.

4. Give the Right Body Language

Have you ever been holding a discussion with someone in the office, and they have been rude enough to continue checking their emails as you are talking? Or maybe they were looking at their watch every few minutes.

Well, this body language shows that they are not at all interested in what you are saying. If you are too busy to hold a discussion, then the polite thing would be to set another time for the discussion whereby you can give it your full attention.

When the discussion is taking place, lean forward slightly and maintain a comfortable eye contact with the other person.

Taking notes, in appropriate situations, is a good indicator that you consider the points that the other person is putting across as being important. This is also a great way to remember what all of the points were, because it is simple to forget one or two when the discussion is lengthy.

5. Summarize

A good indicator of whether you have listened well to the discussion is by summarizing it. The significance of this is to confirm that you have correctly understood the points that were made.

Making notes in a work environment is important to be able to summarize. If notes have been made, then summarizing can be done faster and more precise. If you have not made notes, then you may ramble through it, based upon what you can remember about the conversation which will not be effective.

To make summarizing more simple, take notes in point format. Another tip, which is a great help, is to add your thoughts to the notes as you go along.

This needs to be done as you will want to put across your thoughts and ideas also, but you are aware of the fact that you need to wait and listen in the first instance. It is simple to forget something if you do not raise it immediately. For this reason taking notes is a very helpful task.

Effective listening will be very difficult if you do not use the points listed above. However, you will be aware of the fact that it is well worth your efforts when you do utilize the techniques and realize that it is more effective in achieving your objectives during discussions and meetings.

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The Basics Of Reiki

Filed Under (Inner Peace, Meditation, Personal Growth, Spiritual Growth, Wellness) by Kevin on 23-03-2008

After a 3 week fasting retreat on Mount Kumara in Japan in the early 1920s, Mikao Usui developed Reiki. Two Japanese symbols make up the word Reiki, they are Rei, which is Spirit and Ki, which is life force. Therefore, the practice of Reiki is the channeling of the universal Spirit energy, life force. It involves the Reiki practitioner lying on of their hands to channel this energy into the recipients body. During a Reiki treatment, the recipient lies fully clothed upon a couch, the practitioner will then make gentle contact along various parts of the body. There are times when the energy flow channels without actually touching the body. Some practitioners hold a distance of just a few centimeters away from the body. However, Reiki treatments are applicable remotely or by long distance. At these times, the flow of energy focuses on a symbol, which represents the recipient, who is located in a different area.

Reiki practitioners believe that this energy is universal, and does not originate from the practitioner rather it flows freely from the Universe into the top of the head or the crown chakra and continues to flow out through the hands and into the recipient. Since this is Universal energy at work, it can be practiced on oneself as well as learned and used by any number of individuals, no matter their intellect or other abilities.

Reiki is classified as an alternative, harmonizing therapy it is not a religion. By attuning these energy flows within the body, while clearing any blockage of energy, it has a holistic influence. Reiki has no claim of providing immediate relief of any individual pains; there is personal evidence that Reiki is helpful for a vast number of ailments. Reiki works by supporting and stimulating the natural healing process of the body. The recipient must be a willing participant, in order for Reiki to work efficiently, sin any resistance by the recipient will cancel out the effects of a treatment. A variety of physical reactions during Reiki treatments have been reported, such as twitching while no one else may feel a thing, warmth, cold and tingling. Very often, a Reiki treatment provides you with a feeling of relaxation and mental calmness.

Typically, a Reiki session involves the lying on of hands to particular areas of the body for about 3 to 5 minutes, before moving on to the next area. There may be up to 20 different areas to covered, such as the head, the back and front of the torso, the knees and feet. The whole treatment can last anywhere between 45 minutes to an hour and a half. If there is a particular complaint or problem, the treatment can be localized in its focus and intent. Reiki can be practiced in a formal setting as well as an informal setting, which combines with social interaction. At these times, each practitioner may take a turn at being the recipient of such treatments.

Reiki practices may include:

- Kenyoku Ho

This is a practice of cleansing the body, heart and spirit. It involves the sweeping movements of the hands to alternate from the right shoulder to the left hip and then from the left shoulder to the right hip.

- Hatsurei Ho

This is a practice of unifying the body and mind, while purifying the mind. It involves sitting still or the seiza position, while reciting precise, calming verses of poetry.

Keep in mind that it is not recommendable to discontinue any form of treatment in lieu of Reiki treatments, since it does not claim to be a substitute for any form of treatment. Reiki does however, offer various potential benefits. It has been graciously received, since its introduction to the west, in 1938, but Hawayo Takata. Reiki has many powerful advantages, such as being simple to learn and practice, while being non-invasive, with little to no bad side effects and it can be self-administered.

Although, Reiki is not a religion, it does promote more than a few principles of origin, these are attributed to Emperor Meiji, and they include:

Just for today - Be compassionate and honest with yourself and with others.

Just for today - Avoid worrisome anger.

Following these principles are very beneficial and helpful, regardless of the other benefits provided by the practice of Reiki.

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The Secrets Behind Successful Relationships

Filed Under (Personal Growth, Relationships, Self Esteem) by Kevin on 21-03-2008

Relationships are important to our mental, physical, and emotional well-being. In order for a relationship to be considered “successful” it must stand on a solid foundation. This foundation will allow it to survive even the most complicated of all situations that may arise. In this relationship guide, I will share with you some of the secrets behind successful relationships. If you want to ensure that you and your partner are able to sustain the relationship that you are in together, these unique ingredients will result in a successful formula.

One of the first things that you can do when it comes to keeping a relationship fresh and successful is to be certain that you are open to the feelings and opinions of your partner. In turn, your partner should also be receptive to you. Sharing our feelings, as well as the things that we hold value in is very important. When there is no one else there to share these intimate instances with, your partner should be. Being able to communicate effectively is the main ingredient to each and every single successful relationship. If this area of the bond that you share is affected, you will quickly experience other areas in the relationship that are rough.

It is important to understand that every relationship will experience a crossroads in which there is a difference in feelings, expectations, and opinions. It is not a difference that makes a relationship rocky, it is the inability to recognize and appreciate these differences. The secret to overcoming this is to find a mutual agreement between the both of you. If you are able to do this, you will quickly find that things run smoothly, with little cause for concern. Compromise is an essential when it comes to the secrets behind successful relationships. Knowing and implementing compromise in your relationship can go a long way!

The next ingredient that helps formulate a successful relationship is being able to listen appropriately to your partner. Not only will listening truly allow you to hear what is being said when it comes to your relationship, but it will also allow your partner to be comfortable when it comes to expressing themselves. When your partner speaks, it is important that you allow them to do so. Interrupting them and causing them to become defensive about their unique stand on things can cause a lot of problems. Just instill some basic consideration when it comes to the lines of communication in the relationship, and you will quickly emerge successful and happy.

Remaining positive in the relationship can mean the difference between success and failure. You should always strive to see things in a positive light – including your partner. No one likes a pessimist, or “realist” and many pessimists enjoy calling themselves. Those that are positive and take a unique stand on even the most challenging circumstances are generally easy to approach, talk to, and reside with. If you find that things are getting a bit “rocky” in your relationships, you should change to this frame of mind. You will quickly emerge happier, healthier, and your relationship will truly blossom!

By following the simple steps listed here, you will soon begin to discover that you have a successful relationship that you can be content with. Success is often viewed as being in the “eye of the beholder”, and that is not the way it should be when it comes to relationships. Success should be in the life of the doer. If you are a doer, and want to make things succeed, then they will!

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