Rejoicing in the good fortune of others will improve your relationships and bring more happiness into your life. There are some major benefits to sharing in the joy of others, and here are ways that you can adopt this powerful way of thinking.

Benefits of Rejoicing in the Good Fortune of Others:

1. Dispel your anxieties. Viewing the world as a zero sum game where another person’s win is your loss is bound to cause tension. Thinking in terms of abundance will ease your anxieties and help you enjoy more peace of mind.

2. Liberate yourself from jealousy and envy. Jealousy and envy are unpleasant emotions and can sabotage relationships that you value. When you share in their joy, you eliminate envy!

3. Find more reasons to celebrate. If you enjoy the opportunity to celebrate when you have good news of your own, you can multiply those good times. Seize every opportunity to cheer for the success of others as well as the events in your own life.

4. Increase your personal happiness. You create the causes for your own happiness by the way you think. Recognizing the positive things in life will increase your happiness. It will also make your good feelings more stable than the temporary pleasures of any single individual.

5. Strengthen your relationships. People are more likely to respond positively to you if they sense that you’re truly happy for them. Also, there’s a reason why marriage vows typically specify for better and for worse. Healthy relationships involve sharing both ups and downs.

6. Pay it forward. Paying it forward is an enduring concept because it works. Giving unselfishly enriches us all regardless of the beneficiary.

How to Rejoice in the Good Fortune of Others:

1. Focus on others rather than yourself. It’s easy to get caught up in your own struggles. Be sure to keep in touch with what’s going on in the lives of the people around you. Others may be bashful about mentioning their own victories but still appreciate having their efforts recognized.

2. Examine the consequences of jealousy and envy. Be honest with yourself when you notice any jealous tendencies. The more clearly you see them, the more motivated you will be to put them aside.

3. Contemplate the good things in your own life. It can be difficult to feel good for other people while you’re feeling deprived. Remind yourself of all the wonderful things you have to be grateful for.

4. Embrace artificial steps if necessary. It’s okay to use some artificial gestures to get started. Even if you’re not purely happy that your ex-husband got an award, you can say something gracious and imagine how good it would feel to have no reservations about congratulating him.

5. Start with the people you love. Getting instantly excited about the lives of strangers may be beyond your grasp at the present time. However, you can focus on the people you love. For example, for most parents, it’s natural to feel great enthusiasm about every developmental milestone in their child’s life.

6. Work your way up to dealing with things you wanted for yourself and people who you find difficult. With practice, you’ll be able to tackle the more sensitive issues. When you find the techniques that work with the people you love, you can use those same strategies during more challenging circumstances.

Rejoicing in the good fortune of others is an accurate and constructive way of looking at the world. Welcome more joy into your own life and strengthen your relationships by taking delight in the well-being of others.

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Finding inspiration comes naturally to some people. For others, it takes practice. If you don’t feel very inspired right now, the good news is that you can change the way you look at things and, in doing so, you’ll welcome more inspiration into your life.

Where to Look

Inspiration can be found everywhere, but different experiences generate enthusiasm in different people. If what you’re seeing doesn’t move you, try changing your location. If you’re in the city, head for nature. If you’re out in a rural setting, check out the bustle of the big city.

Sometimes a change in perspective and scenery can make all the difference. If you’ve tried that and it hasn’t helped, perhaps try focusing on the specifics. Maybe you’re inspired by the shimmer of dew on a petal, the reflection of the setting sun on the multi-paned windows of a skyscraper, or the tapestry of voices in a busy coffee shop.

What Do You See?

Of course, where you’re looking might not be the only reason you’re not feeling inspired. Your mindset can also have a big impact on whether you feel inspired. Open your mind so you can really see what’s there. Avoid looking just at the surface, but focus on what’s beneath it. You might be surprised at what you find.

For example, when your young daughter says, “Play this game with me,” do you see a bored child or do you feel the love and joy that she brings to every chance to spend some quality time with you? When the sun rises in the morning, do you think, “It’s too early to get up” or do you feel gratitude for the opportunities this new day can bring to you?

How to Seek Things That Inspire You

With a positive mental attitude, things will look far different than they do when you’re unhappy or angry. Of course, everyone feels bad sometimes. If you find that you’re always feeling sad and uninspired, though, it might be time to change your focus toward something that brings you joy.

Taking time to stop and smell the roses – just enjoying the moment – might be all you need to find your inspiration!

While others can bring you happiness at times, true joy must come from within. Inspiration is often the same. It comes from inside of you, and is only sparked by outside sources that you see and hear. If you aren’t sure how to look for inspiration, consider:

• Talking with a loved one about the things that inspire that person.
• Going somewhere that you haven’t been before to get a different perspective.
• Looking at something you see every day in a different way or from a different angle.
• Closing your eyes and seeking inspiration in the sounds and smells around you.

Sometimes you need to get creative with the way you hunt for inspiration. It’s literally everywhere, but it can be easy to miss in the bustle of our lives. To move away from your ordinary perspectives, a little bit of a shakeup could be necessary. Often just a small action or a change in perspective can help you experience the world in a whole new way.

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How good do you really think of yourself mentally? If you ask yourself if you are intelligent, do you answer with a nod and a smile, or with an ashamed “maybe”? In answering this question, you should know that there are a lot of things to consider, and your IQ score is just one of those. The reality is that if you think of yourself as better, your brain will perform better.

Your outlook and perspective on things like this will definitely influence the performance of your brain. If you really believe that you are good enough, then your brain may just start performing to level with your expectation. Some may say that basic intelligence would never change after the childhood stage of your life, but then there are still some who believe that psychology has an influence in this.

The Influential Psychology in Brain Function

You may have heard of stories wherein the protagonist, who never even stepped into high school, was able to work his way from rags to riches. He just used his guts and determination as he climbs his way to the top. His childhood may have shown him that he can be as rich as his friends if he would only work hard for it. Because of this, he followed what he knew, and because he knew that he too can be rich, he did work hard for it. His outlook was that he can do if others were able to do it.

He never received any money from his rich friends, and he never received any assistance as he worked his way. But what he got from his friends was his expectation. If he never met his rich friends, if he never knew that it is possible to be rich, he would not have worked hard to be where he is right now. He had a goal when he met them, and all he had to do was to just work hard to reach that goal – and so he did.

See, expectations of yourself can play a big role in your life. It serves as your motivation. It makes you feel that you are on to something possible, something that is just within your reach if you just work hard enough. This is the influence of psychology. Don’t you think that it is possible that by just thinking that you can think harder and learn faster, your brain might just do the same thing for you?

Experiential and Evidential Learning

After you have viewed yourself with better perspective, then it is time for you to be more attentive to the things around you which can serve as an evidence that you are about to reach your goal. After you have done all the affirmations, you need hard proof. Take note of your progress regardless of whether they are too small or too big. Focus on these developments. You will soon realize that the more you appreciate your small developments, more of them would soon follow.

So, in applying to your brain development, if you think hard enough that you can improve your brain performance, and then your brain would soon perform better. The improvements may not be as drastic as you expect, but there will surely be some changes. Take note of these changes, and soon you will realize that the cumulative effect of these small changes will amount to a big alteration to your brain functioning. Think of yourself as better, your brain will soon live up to your expectations.

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You’ve probably said it yourself and didn’t really believe it: the old saying that behind every dark cloud, there is a silver lining. It’s hard to have much faith in that advice when that cloud is dumping buckets of rain on your parade. But, sure enough, it wasn’t long until the rain stopped and you were walking in sunshine again.

It’s the same with hopeless situations. We’ve all faced them when we know we’re going to lose or fail at something very important to us. It could be your business, a marriage, just a board game or a game of cards.

You’re playing your best, but no matter what you do losing is inevitable. Everything you did seemed right at the time and by the time you discover your mistakes, it’s too late. First of all, it’s never too late until the game of life deals you the death card.

The game of Monopoly can be a perfect teacher of how to play your life. We roll the dice, land on the right properties and make the right buys. But, somehow other players bought better properties and built bigger hotels and stayed out of jail. No matter what you did you kept paying their rent and fines and had to mortgage your valuable holdings just to stay afloat.

Playing at life can be a losing battle at times too. You’re doing all the right things, you budget, plan for the future but failure comes anyway. No matter what you do it all leads to the same outcome like a bad dream where you’re moving in slow motion and you plod to the finish line that says loser.

You may be faced with a hopeless situation at this very moment and you’ve contemplated taking a long walk on a short pier. Hey, it’s okay to lose if you turn those losses into gains!

If you realize there is no way to win, learn from your past mistakes, dust yourself off and try again. If you see you’re going to lose, stop playing to win and start playing to learn. It’s when you learn that you win.

You’ve probably been focused on the long term gain and failed to see the mistakes you kept making in the past. When you play to learn there’s always some measure of victory. Just like in Monopoly, you learn from each roll of the dice.

Analyze your past moves and see where you could have done better so you don’t make the same mistakes again. There is always another roll of the dice and always another game to play.

Playing the game again doesn’t guarantee a win but it guarantees another learning opportunity. You may learn you lack basic skills to ever win until you master them. If you’re stuck in this situation find a way to get out of it and move forward. Know that you can’t undo the past mistakes so don’t get stressed out over them. Use them as stepping stones to a future win.

Life is always offering a fresh new perspective if we choose to see it. We all lose and others have made worst mistakes than you. Be a gracious loser. If perchance you’ve never lost, then maybe you’re not living life to its fullest and leaving a lot of money (and happiness) on the table. There are no hopeless situations when you turn them into learning experiences and search for the silver lining.

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The benefits of maintaining an open mind are many and life expanding. The only way that a person can learn new and interesting things is to have an open mind. This doesn’t mean, of course, to accept and believe everything that one hears, but rather to listen to new information, and to consider and evaluate its merit and its source, and whether it feels right.

Thanks in large part to the Internet, as well as exciting advances in every field of knowledge imaginable, the world is abundantly rich today with an explosion of information. It is coming at us so fast that it is easy to become overwhelmed. It seems as though so much of what we learned in school is now out of date and that it would be beneficial for everyone to start our education all over again.

For instance, we now know that the Newtonian Rules describing the nature of matter have been greatly expanded on by exciting discoveries made by open minded quantum physicists. We have now learned that there are much smaller particles than atoms and that everything is in constant motion. The idea that everything is energy and vibrating, though being described to us as factual, and while we may accept it intellectually, is very difficult to comprehend. Our training and early learning that matter is only solid has been thoroughly indoctrinated into our understanding and knowledge base of reality.

Because of such limiting “rules of the road” the expectations for average humans have been severely curtailed. We have no idea of who we really are or what we are capable of. We are mystified, stumped and suspicious of any concept that does not fall within the thoroughly ingrained knowledge that has been burned into our heads describing solid matter as rigid and obedient only to Newtonian Rules. The idea that matter is anything but solid and unmoving is impossible for a closed minded person to even begin to comprehend. This is true to the extent that some people refuse to accept proven scientific evidence of such incredulously exciting information, even though it has been thoroughly proven. Such knowledge has served as a launch pad of astounding discoveries changing lives everywhere through new technologies and a greater understanding of paranormal experiences.

However, some people, no matter their background as a highly educated scientist or a high school graduate construction worker, remain deadlocked into fixed and restrictive old school notions that prevent them from accepting new information. This is unfortunate because there is so much to learn, and much of this new information contains concepts that can improve our lives individually and collectively. The possible improvements are not solely related to material advancement, but to our spiritual evolvement as well.

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We know for a fact that all people want to be successful in life. Whether you are an engineer, an internet marketer, or a business owner, you want to be successful at what you do. Success means that you will be able to achieve financial freedom. However, not all people become successful. So, why is it that only a few people becomes successful at what they do?

Well, for starters, successful people don’t give up easily in finding success. The problem with many people is that they give up on finding success even before they start. They think that their goals are difficult to achieve and that they rather give up than spending time in achieving their goals. This is the wrong attitude.

You have to remember the road to success is not a walk in the park. It is a road that is full of challenges and difficulties that you need to overcome for you to reach your goals. If you give up just because you saw the challenges are difficult to overcome, then you already failed in achieving success.

You need to have the mindset of an entrepreneur. Never think like an employee where you will always prefer going the easy way. If you think like an entrepreneur, then you will have the proper focus on how you will be able to become successful.

Instead of giving up on a problem, you will focus more on how to overcome your problem. By thinking like an entrepreneur, you will be focusing on the right ideas on how to overcome the challenges that you meet on your way to success.

Changing your mindset is the first and difficult step that you need to take on the road to success. If you’ve been an employee for too long, then you will probably have the mindset of an employee who shy away from problems and let the other employees handle it. Change this kind of attitude. For example, from thinking how you can’t do it, think of how you can do it. Always think of a positive way on how you will be able to overcome the difficulties that you will face in your road to success.

Being successful means that you need to have a positive outlook in life. By thinking like an entrepreneur, you can be sure that you will be able to get closer to your success.

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First off, a definition is in order. Attitude refers to the tendency to act and react in either a positive or negative manner to a given object, idea, event and person. Said action and reaction can be very specific (i.e., chocolates, color, mother) or very general (i.e., change, technology).

Our attitudes come from the interplay of complex forces that enter our lives. You attitude will come from social interactions with those inside and outside your social-economic circle, from familial interactions with family members of all ages, from the tri-media and the Internet, and many others. With that said, the adage about attitude being everything contains more than a grain of truth in it. After all, we are almost always judged by the attitude we manifest in our daily lives, from the way we walk to the way we talk!

Why Attitude Is Important

Attitude is very important in many respects and in many aspects of our lives, from the personal to the professional areas and from the social to the familial relationships. Again, the way we think and act are determined by our attitudes and the way we exhibit our attitudes paves the way to how we are judged by those around us. In short, our attitudes dictate our actions and decisions in life. So, if you think that your life is going nowhere, start looking into your attitude towards success.

Thus, when you want to change something in life, you must first look into changing attitudes that may be in contradiction with said change. For example, when you desire to be more popular, you have to change your negative attitude towards social interaction. And did you know that scientific studies have pointed out the health benefits of positive attitude? Since depression and anxiety, both of which are manifestations of a negative attitude, can precipitate health problems like heart disease, asthma, hypertension and even cancer, it pays to be more positive towards your health and your life.

Ways to Change Your Attitude for the Better

Fortunately, there are ways to change attitudes for the better. Psychologists and therapists have developed three basic categories for doing so, which you can adopt in your daily life.

First, you can utilize the cognitive approach wherein a change in the way a person thinks about an object is achieved through persuasive communication. Usually, conflict must be created between the old attitude and the new attitude. For example, if your attitude towards the environment is one of eco-friendliness and yet you drive a gas guzzler, conflict between your beliefs and your actions will be discussed. Then, the viable alternatives to harmonize the two will be presented, which you can then choose from in order to change your attitude.

Second, you can apply the behavioral approaches with their carrot-and-stick style of changing attitudes. The premise behind it is that humans will repeat actions that are rewarded and avoid behaviors that are punished, hence changing the attitude towards a certain object.

There are parameters to using the behavioral approach that will increase the chances for success in using this method. For one thing, the reinforcement must be fairly specific either in tangible or intangible terms. For another thing, the rewards must be clearly linked to the desired behavior and the rewards themselves must be desirable and equitable compensation for the desired behavior. For example, in your weight loss efforts, your reward for an achieved goal can be a feast of your favorite foods in moderate quantities even for just a day. Your punishment can be extra hour on the treadmill.

Third, you may use the social approaches of modeling and consensus to change the attitudes of individuals within a group. Or even your attitude within your social circle. Basically, the social approaches are premised on the human tendency to mimic the attitudes and actions of the people we admire. For example, you can find yourself a mentor who will guide you through your attitude changes. At the very least, you have a role model who actually lives the life you want for yourself.

You can choose just one or use a combination of these approaches to changing attitudes. Keep in mind that there are no hard and fast rules in their uses, just flexible applications depending on the situation at hand.

In conclusion, our attitudes determine how we think, how we act, how we react and how we live our lives. It is important then to change our attitudes whenever necessary to allow us to live fuller, healthier and longer lives in the short time we have on Earth.

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Changing the way that you think isn’t always an easy process. You may have been following the same thought process for years or for decades. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing but it just means that you need to give the changes plenty of time to occur. Should you fall back into old habits, try to remind yourself why you are working to improve the way that you think. Then get back into that structure as soon as you can. The more you work at it the faster you will complete that transformation process.

You may become frustrated because it hasn’t been an easy road to follow. View that as part of the challenge. In fact, it is supposed to be hard and that part of all of it is going to help you to create a mind that is stronger than it was before. Your brain can learn new things at all stages of life to give you the upper hand. Try to break your overall goal down into steps that are easier to manage. Keep that list in a place where you can see it often. Then you can identify how far you have already come to reaching your final goal. When the going gets tough that type of motivation is going to keep you strong.

The steps you take should increase in difficulty as you move along. This is important to remember. If you put the hardest things to do out there at first you will most likely fail. However, when you have the harder things to perform further down the road you will have more of a vested interest in seeing it through to the end. Your early accomplishments will serve as a solid foundation that you get to build on as you move each step forward.

Make sure that you incorporate a good variety of methods to improve the way that you think. The progress you make will be more obvious when you have more than one tool that you are using. Have fun with these tools as well including reading or games. Don’t continue activities that you get no enjoyment out of. This is because improving the way you think is a positive thing and you don’t want the road to getting there littered with negativity.

It is a good idea to set a time frame for carrying out your goals to improve the way that you think. Saying that you will do it simply isn’t good enough. Have a detailed plan of how you are going to do it. This way you can motivate yourself to follow that plan and those guidelines. Periodically evaluate how that plan is working. If you need to vary it then do so.

Your attitude towards changing the way you think is also something you need to keep in perspective. Being patient is a virtue that too many of us simply don’t have. When you are able to take a deep breath, relax, and stay on track things will fall into place for you. Don’t rush the transformation or assume it won’t happen because it is taking a while. Remember that it did take you a long-time to think the way you do right now. Therefore it is reasonable to expect it to take time for that to all change as well.

Tags: Attitude, Change, Personal Growth, Self Help and Motivational

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There is a proper time and place for every act of body language. Most of the time, we are oblivious to the messages we send through our body gestures and movements. We could give negative signals that might offend other people without intending to do so. There are gestures that we indeed have to avoid, but it may need discipline and practice because we may have been used to performing this negative acts in our daily lives.

It is important for one to be observant of his body language, and those of other people as well. You can read other people by learning how to understand how they act and move. But you must also be aware there are people who know how to interpret body language, and somebody may already be reading you now. Thus, be cautious of actions by knowing when to use them and what to avoid.

At Work

It is always relevant to be in your best self at work. By doing so, you can impress your boss and please clients. Simply be confident when facing somebody. If you are relaxed, other people would not regard you as overconfident. Show them you know what you are talking about by keeping good posture, eye contact and using suitable hand gestures.

During A Date

How can you give signs that you are indeed attracted to another person without telling them verbally how you really feel? The solution is simple. Talk with your eyes and match it with a bright smile. These two are enough to let somebody know you are indeed enjoying his or her company.

You would know the date is going well when signals of flirtation are present. A woman would tend to touch her hair, lick her lips, eat or drink slowly, and preen. Meanwhile, a man would usually wink, close the distance between them, lean forward, and stand tall. Bottom line is both sexes want to impress their partner by showing the self-confidence or sexiness through actions. And these signs are indeed just the beginning of a higher level in the relationship.

Acts You Must Practice To Avoid

There are many kinds of gestures that you must practice to avoid. At work, try to hide your anxiety or tension by avoiding fidgeting, trembling, or shaking. Avoid excessive hand movements when talking, since this could distract others from focusing on your statements. Avoid also excessive blinking; this shows you are uneasy and nervous. Stop looking at your watch or the clock. This is rude since you are giving an impression that you want to end the interaction right away. Do not stroke you chin, lean on an elbow, and fake a smile.

When on a date, it would be much more polite if you directly say “no” rather than showing signals of rudeness to the person if you are uninterested or getting bored. Do not sigh, look at other people other than your partner, slouch, and prop your head on your hands.

Observe Cultural Differences

The proper use of body language also depends on where you are and who you are interacting with. You may be talking to somebody with a conservative culture and regards some gestures rude and disrespectful, even if they are normally used in your place.

Tags: Attitude, NLP, Personal Growth, Relationships, Self Help and Motivational

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Much has been said about the spheres of power as an individual goes through the phase of wanting to achieve greater heights. However, it is also important to begin with building your confidence with self-esteem before taking a step further.

Initially, knowing the basics of leadership, influence or success start off as a personal search in dissecting the individual psyche, that of developing the person to be confident in himself through building self-esteem and the desire to succeed.

But what exactly is self-esteem?

In essence, it is someone’s personal appraisal or evaluation of a person’s own worth.

Simply put, it is the sense of how a person establishes self-worth, which ultimately shapes the path for a person’s quest in life, it is the concept of personality which can only be determined by the person himself.

Extensive research has been poured out to define to self-esteem and how it plays an important role in personal ambition and residual success, how it help shapes a person’s character and plays a key role in developing personal priorities.

In psychology, the studies and researches on self-esteem has constantly been intended to explore and discover what people generally believe they need to be doing to establish their worth or value as a person, as well as the underlying effects of those beliefs.

This personal pursuit is then responsible for that individual sense of satisfaction of basic human needs for independence, better learning, autonomy, physical health, mental stability, relationships and self-regulation.

There are several motivators behind the pursuit for self-esteem and what people commonly associate as the primary driver for establishing their self-worth.

Virtue is one of those drivers for self-esteem as it defines a person’s good qualities and the need for high merit, both personally and socially.

Virtue answers the need for an individual’s desire for acceptance into a social network.

Another motivator in the quest for self-esteem is a person’s search for God’s love, regardless of a person’s religious belief or affinity.

Man’s innate need for a deity or a worship figure is surprisingly one of the most important need man aspires for in order to be at peace with himself, eventually resulting to a positive self-esteem.

Many career-driven people, on the other hand, point out there are also other causes that drive self-esteem.

First there’s academic competence, which has become a yard stick and a measuring tool for those wanting to achieve greater opportunities in landing a well-paying and rewarding career.

Others also feel confident about getting their self-esteem by improving their own physical appearances, especially those wanting to look more attractive, on which their self-esteem is dependent in the outcome of their desire to become physically attractive.

There are some who simply believes that by just gaining the approval of others, regardless of whether it be a personal, selfless or unsolicited action, they are able to gain that sense of fulfillment and boost their self-esteem.

To sum it all up, there are various means and many ways for people to know what can help them boost their self-esteem and gaining it is a foundation and stepping stone to reaching those dreams and ambitions, knowing that building your confidence with self-esteem is the next best thing to fulfillment and satisfaction.

Tags: Attitude, Personal Growth, Self Confidence, Self Esteem, Self Help and Motivational

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